Classic disaster. Beautiful adventure.

A couple months ago I made a list of things to do. The plan was to do these things, and then suddenly, I'de be myself again. I'd be.. Lexie. I'd be the girl who.. what? Who am I? Does anyone know? Because I certainly don't. There are about three or four people in this whole world that actually understand me. I'm not one of them. I don't think I ever will be. I've done almost everything on my list. I made a timeline of my past year. I bought.. earrings. I... made a new friend. I don't feel any different. I don't know what I'm expecting. It's not like I'll just wake up one day and know who I am. That would be nice, though. I took every crappy song off of my iPod. I got rid of a distraction. I loved. I listed my priorities. How can I be myself again when I don't know who I was in the first place? I know that I like hats. And I know that I hate sports. Am I the only person who thinks about this? I think too much. About everything. It's like a disease. Maybe by the end of this post, I'll have my problem solved. Is it a problem? Is not knowing who you are a problem? Or is it just how it should be? How are people defined? Is it like..by their family? Or their favorite things? Or what makes them happy? Maybe I'm always myself, and I just change. Or maybe, I'm myself sometimes, but not all the time. Maybe whatever I am or do or think is who I am. I'm always myself? When I'm tired and mean am I still Lexie? Because when Davis is tired and quiet, I say "You're not Davis." But he's still Davis. He's just tired, quiet Davis. So.. moods. I guess.. everyone has different moods? But, why? Why can't we just be feeling one steady thing at all times? I guess life would be boring that way. But if life was that way, we wouldn't know any different. Therefore, we wouldn't know that it was boring. Therefore, we wouldn't be bored. Who cares if we're bored? I think I'm in love with words. I'd rather read about a picture than look at a picture. That's weird. Why am I like that? Why am I so weird? If no one's the same, then is everyone weird? Is weird the opposite of normal? I've never heard anyone say anyone else was normal. This is my thought train. I love Train. I know what I love, and what I hate, and what makes me happy, and who my favorite people are, but I don't know who I am. I don't know what I'm supposed to do, or be. Because I'm The Wind. I'm.. I'm The Wind.