Whatever could it Be

A band of vampires walk through a valley, in a parade of sorts. All looking diligently for a girl named emma. But they're not looking in the Trees or under rocks, they're looking straight ahead & behind their own shoulders and in their own coat pockets and up with all the clouds. at once the pitter patter, pat dat dah pitaah, pattah of all their dusty walking shoes fades & the only sound is a distant roar. Similar to that of an angry ocean tide let loose from its Cage of gravity. the vampires were surprised to see exactly that, as the roaring waters Grew closer. now all swallowed up by the Sea, the vampires silently allowed themselves to be tossed and taken. One vampire managed to stick his head out of the Water,, just long enough to express "mm salty," before the waves pushed him under again. after a few hours, the vampires fell asleep somehow in the vast bed of dancing ocean. They were beginning to forget about their search, it didn't seem likely that they would ever find Emma now. They didn't even know where in the world they were, or how long theyd been with the waves. a Certain upstanding vampire awoke with a sudden determination. His name was ace and he was a really take charge kind of guy. while all the other vampires were sleeping, ace began to build a ladder. He remembered their search& their purpose& was not going to let a little water clog his sense. he worked night and day on building that ladder until it was of Magnificent height, he climbed to the top, and breathless, stared down at the Waves water below. It was, absolutely, beautiful. as it tossed furiously with an effortless elegance, Ace could see the shadows of the dreaming vampires all below the surface. The wave seemed to notice Ace's high presence. he leaned down a little and said quite loudly "hellow down there!! What is your name?" .."Emma" the wave replied, & all was silent. Ace smiled shyly at having found the lost and, satisfied, down back into the water.

augustus

how beautiful you are, my darling. Focus. a focus. Each day is a long line of moments and a few stand out among the many. some are so fleeting but some grab us by the throat until we turn anew, some like to poke at another moment we’ve held dear. How glorious it is that we with our mere anchors for bodies can experience short bottles of time that lift us from where we are and turn on the lights. Ya know, when someone says that something and their eyes light up and you just deeply want to paint with the color of their voice. Because you know you could always dig that painting out of the attic and stare into the color and remember, even for a second, you can climb once again to the peak of that moment and rest upon it. You can sit at the top and see for miles the feelings, smells, befores and afters of right then.

It is those moments and those people that bring us neck deep into the ocean of abundant appreciation. if you recognize the blessings you have, you’re drowning. In goodness. and the richest love known and unknown.

Ever look at someone and just feel like they alone are the entire world? ever hold a hand and long to always have it there. Good. glad for you. never met a person in my life that in my life that i can say I have felt honest hate for. because in everyone there lies some good somewhere. It may very well be a minuscule particle of good dust that they accidentally breathed in at a birthday party or something, but its there within them. As it is also in every situation.

may who has been be revived again, may the woods swallow up the shivering wind. May the hour behind bring peace to your mind, and may that light in your eye cease to die.

osaka sun

Simple life sounds so desirable, but i don't think its really so intended. the love of Jesus within me is not at all simple. It is depth, it is vast,and It will take eternity to know its Every meausure. The dreams and passions within me are not simple.they are big, colorFul, overflowing. Simple seems to be one of those things that only exists outside of a person. what about a human being is simple? not the way all our organs work ideally together, not the way we each are capable of unique, inidiviudal though. not the purpose we were designed for. certainly simple just isn't so Itself.

i don't even Want this soup anymore

oh calm,
the silence inbetween the
songs
oh breath
stolen from the lungs
of a life far too
young.

our hearts are not equipped for end, simply because we are built for eternity. it is our humanity limits what we long to understand, and perhaps that is our tragic flaw, being hu.man.
but is it a flaw if it is intended? certainly, under love, humanity is what unifies us.

the God i know knows, what he is doing. and he sees our hearts and he sees the storm clouds within us that are tied so heavily to his name, however he is Faithful. it is not for us to understand, for understanding is one of the heaviest burdens to bear.
ive no words aside from His ways are not our ways. his thoughts are not our thoughts.
and however hard it may be to focus on the Glorious unseen, do so.
it is so easy to distrust when we think miracles don't ever happen anymore, those days are far over, but look around, YOUR existence itself is a miracle. tell me what is not miraculous about seeds that make trees that make air for our lungs that breathe that make co2 for the trees that are seeds. tell me what is not miraculous about the color of your eyes.

a huge question is why do bad things happen to good people, well, why would satan need to attack bad people? Bad people are not furthering the kingdom of god, they're not a threat to satan. Why should he waste his time on them? good people, tho. man, those good people, they have satan clawing at the air in an eager rage to tear them apart because he knows that if he doesn't, God will win. As if God has not already won.
it makes sense that Satan would choose to attack a life so fresh with the spirit. it does not make sense why God would allow it, but you and i we only see the thumb infront of our face, we are as of now blind to all the colors, situations, will happens, could happens, alwayses directly behind that thumb.
a loss, a loss, a love.

this, my explanation

new is best , early is better, we believe this because it's what we've experience.
things are alwase better good seemingly perfect, and then they can't get any better and instead grow worse.
when you meet someone new and they are so cool and intriguing in a completely unorthodox fashion, then you know them more, you know what their favorite color is, then you being to know what drink they will order, and what time they will have to be home, it goes on. seems to be really getting downhill when you start to know what they're going to say. then you know so much that anything and everyone seems more new than they. and we see that as a bad thing because we remember when they were knew and how exciting it was to speak and dig into that persons thoughts and memories, hear stories you could never had imagine because you simply didn't know.
same with many things, seasons, those first signs of summer the sun, the uh lemonade, the wearing as little clothes as possible, then in a month or so or two, it grows so familiar we can't appreciate it anymore. towns, friends, coffeeshops, bands, vegetables, a school year, an idea, a book, this happens so much and it often ends sadly.
but i believe it doesn't have to really, ya know, sure things are exciting new like a splash of water in your face or maybe coffee, maybe even GOLD,. it's a surprise ya know, gold hits your face and you can't help but think damn that was interesting i want more, then gold hits your face everyday and you can't remember what it was like when you never knew what it felt like to have gold hit your face. but also, you can know deeper, people are always changing, things are always being seen realised or remembered. maybe some days there is nothing to say, maybe some months, or maybe just a moment. maybe you just really want to say Gold, get off my face please, i'd like to uh close my eyes for awhile , but perhaps Gold would take offense.
try so to not dwell on comparison between the beginning and the current, that leads to dark paths of thought with a broken lantern and an empty lighter. Love that the new occurred. how many memories painted that new, a lot right? blessings. and know that if whatever is is to be contiuned, it will be. no need to fret on maintaining that thrill of a start, just let it be. let it grow, become taller, more colorful. maybe let it stretch out. Get the gold off your face and hold it, stare at it awhile. You don't need a cure, an excuse, to explain, you do not need to relapse or refrain or regret or neglect, just acknowledge the way life has always swayed and take it's hand and let it teach you how to dance.

there is Something beautiful about a Clock that doesn't tick

that sound they make,
the most irritating thing i've ever known perhaps.
just why do we need to know, really,
how many seconds are left in this minute? or how many minutes in this hour, hours in this day, days in this life?
Time is not an enemy, simply a means of understanding created by God, as all things were, i believe to help us, God doesn't have bad ideas

it is so so nice to not know what time it is, i think not knowing that may be my favorite thing to not know. Some days we're tired of school, tired of existing, tired of having to explain why we're so tired, and if it's not fixed it often drags on over into the next day then it becomes a lifestyle. when something becomes, something else begins to be forgotten.
so, stop. Every thing that happens, from now on, this is, maybe try a cleanse of sorts. find zen. tap into that peace department your heart has been designed to carry.
it is okay to feel hazy,
it is okay to end things and start things and not know what to do about things,
to not know where you're going, that's okay, because you still know where you've been and the two are greatly dependent on each other.
it is okay.
maybe, yes, it says on the wall, All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us. this can be seen a number of ways, choose this one: don't think about how much time you have, don't have, need, need to kill, wish you had, would like back, don't think about any of that. think about how this second, right now, you are here. you are breathing with a beating heart and some growing bones, and you are alive and that's on purpose.
an escape, a soul vacation, take one. find what you love, love what you find. get a job, quit a job, be alone, read a really fucking good book,
i'm reading this book right now about this girl who leaves her town with no idea and no destination what so ever. she says she's going to fill up her tank with gas, then leave, she wants a new name too right. she decides what ever the town is in which her gas runs out, that's her name. fills up again. whichever town she runs out of gas in , that's where she will stay
fiction is a little extreme, but hey 'we all have our topics'.
breathe a little deeper.

dried tomato

some people fall in love with other people, some people fall in love with things, some people fall in love with places. recently i fell in love with the sun it was truly, unexpected i mean the sun and i have known each other for years then out of nowhere i'm seeing it every day. not just seeing it i mean, but seeing it. seeing the rays of gold and violet shatter the barrier of glass and clouds, like it's reaching for me. Or stepping outside to a flood of agaonized faces complaining on the heat and looking up and seeing That sun, that sun that seems to somehow have been waiting for me to walk by. Chasing it. ever chased the sun? it changes colors.
i dont know, man, just the sun is everything we are all supposed to be. it's so aware of it's purpose, it knows who it is, it knows how to be and where to go all the time. Sure some days we'd rather it stay in bed or on the other side of the world maybe, but really think. beauty. beautiful, the sun is.
in love.