i don't even Want this soup anymore

oh calm,
the silence inbetween the
songs
oh breath
stolen from the lungs
of a life far too
young.

our hearts are not equipped for end, simply because we are built for eternity. it is our humanity limits what we long to understand, and perhaps that is our tragic flaw, being hu.man.
but is it a flaw if it is intended? certainly, under love, humanity is what unifies us.

the God i know knows, what he is doing. and he sees our hearts and he sees the storm clouds within us that are tied so heavily to his name, however he is Faithful. it is not for us to understand, for understanding is one of the heaviest burdens to bear.
ive no words aside from His ways are not our ways. his thoughts are not our thoughts.
and however hard it may be to focus on the Glorious unseen, do so.
it is so easy to distrust when we think miracles don't ever happen anymore, those days are far over, but look around, YOUR existence itself is a miracle. tell me what is not miraculous about seeds that make trees that make air for our lungs that breathe that make co2 for the trees that are seeds. tell me what is not miraculous about the color of your eyes.

a huge question is why do bad things happen to good people, well, why would satan need to attack bad people? Bad people are not furthering the kingdom of god, they're not a threat to satan. Why should he waste his time on them? good people, tho. man, those good people, they have satan clawing at the air in an eager rage to tear them apart because he knows that if he doesn't, God will win. As if God has not already won.
it makes sense that Satan would choose to attack a life so fresh with the spirit. it does not make sense why God would allow it, but you and i we only see the thumb infront of our face, we are as of now blind to all the colors, situations, will happens, could happens, alwayses directly behind that thumb.
a loss, a loss, a love.