viva siempre.

i've always said that i want a john steinbeck lifestyle. people, just people a few really good people. and some coffee, with no regards to time. and we just live whenever we want, however we want.
something about today. the brick sidewalks, organic cigarettes, the Temptations, maybe the vanilla chai. or the people. all of the beautiful people that i have, by the grace of God, come to know. something about today made me realise that i have that life that i've always wanted.

for some reason i always imagined it would start someday. i'd be twenty something and my friends would be over and we would be painting and telling stories. then tonight, we were all clapping for the moon and something in me just opened and let all that life in. it's right now. the life i want, i have it. and i didn't even notice.

waking up to them, being dragged out of bed into a car, disoriented and loving it, riding to that same nowhere town with those real live people. hearing them play for the thousandth time and knowing in my soul "they're gonna be big." clapping for the moon, because why should we ever think that's uneccesary, bathroom carpet, singing radiohead in the car, catching sunspots in every picture, reading each other's writing, hearing each other's songs, sitting in each other's cars, never knowing what time it is, eating india bread, howling, opening the window for the hooligans, teaching valcott guitar, dancing with lonny in Room, and writing to the moonlight until the sun wakes up. i don't have to wait ten years, or until high school is over, or until i have a license, i don't have to wait for anything. i'm living now. i've been living now and very well all the time. we're all alive all the time.

life is so abundant. every single day is so full. everything people say, listen to them and listen to yourself. and please see that there is nothing in your way. maybe you have the life you've always wanted and you just don't even notice. notice.